"If I had a knife I'd stick it right through you"

So, Jeremy Beadle’s body has gone the same way as his hand and withered away. It was a bout of pneumonia that finally saw off the famed television prankster.

What better way to mark his passing than by remembering him at his best: out there on the streets, ridiculing, humiliating and terrifying members of the public as he saw fit.

In this clip, Jeremy and his team of unemployed actors conspire hilariously to convince a woman her home and its contents are up for repossession, leading to rib-tickling threats of domestic violence, cruel mocking of the woman’s prized memorabilia and quite possibly the worst fake beard ever seen on British television (if it is indeed fake, that is).



I wonder if ‘Husband Ken’ ever escaped that loveless little death pact?

Prison Bake

Staff and inmates at HMP Manchester, formerly Strangeways Prison, were left hot - and very bothered - when a massive fire broke out. The fire, believed to be serving 25 years for arson and manslaughter, broke out at around 5pm on Tuesday evening. No one was said to be hurt in the incident.

Police say the fire is extremely dangerous and should not be approached by anyone. Members of the public who see the fire are advised to contact Crimestoppers or their local police station.

You tube, I tube, everybody tubes

The downside to being such a hard-partying disco nightmare is that often, I forget things. Not important things like my name (unless I am utterly twatted), but stuff like when a programme is on telly, or when to write about amazing things I have seen on YouTube.

There now follows two YouTube videos that I meant to blog (and fuck off is that ever a verb) aaaaaaages ago. The first - either an impassioned anti-racism track or an account of an explosion round at Willy Wonka’s, however you choose to look at it - is a Stateside smash that has seen its mercurial star, the entirely amazing Tay Zonday, perform on Letterman and various other gosh-aren‘t-I-famous American talk shows.

The second is just a clever music video.

Enjoy.